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I, too, have my sufferings. Since my task is to blaze a new trail in a bleak and lightless world such as that of the present, Satan and Devadatta (a cousin and disciple of the Buddha who turned against, and even plotted the death of his master; he has come to be a symbol of evil) run rampant. It is like being surrounded by a wall bristling with the spears of jealousy, envy, persecution, calumny, and misunderstanding. Trying to overcome these things and gradually turn this hellish world toward paradise is more difficult than can be imagined.

Nevertheless, since I enjoy the protection of the Supreme Spirit, my lot is not so hard as it may appear to outsiders; indeed, I am constantly grateful for the great happiness and wonderful destiny that have been vouchsafed me.

Nonetheless, there is one thing that causes me great suffering. It is, as might be expected, related to modern medical science. Though I have been speaking and writing about the fallacies of modern medicine for many years, I have never yet gone ahead and told the complete, unvarnished truth. I have been careful always to avoid unduly provocative remarks, since I felt that to reveal the whole truth might cause unnecessary trouble. Furthermore, however I might have wished to publish the truth, I was unable to do so until the right time had come.

I have been thoroughly instructed by God in all things pertaining to human health and illness. If I had not, I would never have undertaken the awesome task of creating a world free of sickness. I am able to speak boldly because I am absolutely certain of what I am saying. Since the basis of eliminating suffering is eradicating illness, the utter misery of modern humanity brings me intolerable suffering. I am caught between my sympathy for humanity's plight and the feeling that the time is not right for speaking the full truth. This has caused me such great pain that I have constantly prayed for the speedy arrival of the day for full revelation.


June 3, 1950



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